Self Critique

In this course, blogging has been a weekly task that I have had to complete. I started off strong and completed each week’s blog assignments and put effort into each post. Unfortunately towards the end of the semester I began slacking and failed to every blog. My early posts were the best out of the bunch. I would have to say that the post on the topic of Propaganda was one of the best blogs that I posted.  I chose this as my best work because I remember that I put a lot of time into finding visual examples of propaganda and explaining them in my writing.  Out of the rest of the blogs that I completed, the worst post would be about the discussion forum.  Because I did not participate in the discussion forum I did not have much to talk about and I did not meet the 500-word requirement for this blog in particular. Blogging this semester has been a learning experience.  Finding things to say has been hard and I have had a difficult time reaching the requirement while still maintaining some focus in my writing.  I do not have any aspirations in this domain in the future outside of this class and I would say that my relationship with public writing has not changed much at all.  

Discussion Forum

Sadly I did not participate in the forum discussion.  I had been absent from class the Thursday before and was a little confused about what exactly it was and the point of the assignment.  Because the forum discussion was new and different I found it somewhat overwhelming and it just became more work I had to do in addition to all the other things I had to accomplish that week, so I ended up not participating at all. Obviously I did not think the forum was engaging because I did not do it.  I think that if I had participated I probably would have just read that article and wrote something down and never read anyone else’s responses. Maybe if I understood what the whole thing was about I would have been more willing to participate and spend time in the forum, but I found that overall it seemed too time consuming to read all my classmates responses and opinion and respond to it. In the future I don’t think I would like more forum discussions.  I regret not participating in the forum and I do not really know what it was like, but if I had participated I still think I would not want future forum discussions.

Entering the Conversation

Liberman begins his blog discussing an issue with a newspaper article that falsely claims that omega-3 fish oil supplements helps increase children’s focus and concentration.  He talks about the science writer and how he careless towards what the actual scientific study concluded.  The problem being addressed is the quality of scientific writing in the media today. 

            There are many things that can be learned from Liberman’s post.  After reading his article it made me think more about the validity of the articles that I have read in newspapers in the past. What if the information has been misrepresented like that of the Omega-3 article?  Liberman’s article makes the reader think more about what they see in the media and what they hear on a daily basis. Personally, I think I learned to not trust what you see in the media, even if it seems like it comes from a trusted source such as a popular newspaper.  The importance on researching a topic is also something hat can be taken away from this article.  It is crucial that one uses correct citation of sources, and represents the data correctly in a piece of writing. This article teaches the public to be weary of science articles and to do their own research on the material before coming to any conclusions.

             Liberman uses many pieces of evidence to support his argument against “bad science writers”.  He first uses an article that is promoting the use of Omega-3 fish oil supplements as a means to boost concentration.  Liberman discusses that the science writer for that popular newspaper had completely misused the scientific study.  Liberman states that the study said nothing about omega-3 fish oil supplements increasing focus. In fact the study showed no difference in the use of supplements or not. The evidence he uses is helpful in supporting his argument against bad science writers.  If we can’t trust what a professional writer for a popular newspaper, how do I know I can trust the evidence that Liberman presents? …just a thought.

            The problem of “bad science writers” can be fixed if the authors changed the way the approached their articles.  First they should perform more thorough research on their topic and make sure they get their facts straight.  Another way to fix the problem would to make sure that the newspaper hires trustworthy people with experience in science writing. Another way to prevent this type of false information from reaching the public is by having articles like the omega-3 article checked by an editor.  Either have an editor or another writer review the article for accuracy.  The editor should check the sources and make sure that the material written is in agreement with the study being observed. In addition to an editor checking it before it is published, the public can do their own research on the subject to insure the information they are receiving is true.  Having stricter policies regarding the citation of sources could also help remedy the problem of incorrect information getting to the public.

           

Open Writing

          Posting any form of writing online can have consequences.  The internet is a place that is open for anyone to view what you have written, whether it is on your facebook status, your twitter, or your English blog.  Because of this, you must be careful what you write online.  If you post something that is offensive to other people you could get some vicious feedback or comments, or worse in-person confrontation.  You could also allow people whom you do no know (creepers!!!) to learn things about you that you do not want them to know.  That is why it is crucial when posting writing online to watch the openness of your writing.

            Although there are many disadvantages to the openness of writing online, there are plenty of benefits as well.  Being able to express your opinions and thoughts is one advantage to publishing writing on the internet.  Another benefit is the amount of people it can reach.  Because your writing is on the internet, it has the ability to reach millions and millions of people.  This can be beneficial if you are looking for comments or feedbacks in regards to your writing.  In class we are commenting on each other’s blogs and making statements or posing questions for the author to consider.  This can help students get an idea about what other people think about their opinions or writing style.

            The openness of writing on the internet can also pose challenges.  Because you are able to write about anything, it makes it harder for students to focus on the topic being addressed.  Students might also worry about what to write because they know everyone can see it.  Someone might be less likely to be confident in their writing because of all the possible critics they might have out there on the internet. Overall the challenges of openness are not quite as big of a deal as they would seem.  I feel that I do not have probably posting my writing for this class online, mainly because I honesty do not care about what I write.  Most of my writing does not come from the heart so I do not take anything personally when it comes to negative feedback.  I know this is not the case for many other people.  Most people put time and effort into a piece of writing and may be a little weary to post it onto the internet.  I feel that the best way to address this issue is for them to just be confident in their writing and go a head and post it.  The problem of not knowing what to write, or staying focused on the topic is not an issue with this class because each blog prompt has clear direction for what we should be writing about.  In expressive and personal writing, people are able to write about anything they want which makes the openness a little less challenging.  Overall I think that the benefits of publishing writing online are about equal to the possible consequences and challenges.

Feedback and Critique

     I feel like I am fairly good at offering up criticism to other people in regards to their work.  I try and use good judgment when evaluating a peer’s paper and try to give them as much information that I can think of.  I focus on the things that they did right and how they can expand on those ideas.  I try to not to be harsh about my suggestions, but instead I want to critique them in a way that will only help them.  In some areas I am good at critiquing and in others I am not able to provide good tips.  In regards to grammar I feel as if I can help with structure and proper punctuation within a sentence.  I think that good criticism is very blunt and explains to the writer what exactly they need to fix.  I also think that a critique should also offer up ideas to the writer so that he or she may have something to ponder upon and fix in their final draft.   I also think that in order to be helpful the critic must present his or her thoughts in a way that will be accepted by the author of the paper.  No one wants to listen to someone forcing things upon them. The critic, however, must not be afraid to say what he or she thinks.  The point to having someone critique your paper is so that you get a second opinion and good advice on how to make your paper better.  Constructive criticism can be hard to write sometimes, but if you just make it your main goal to help the person then they will hopefully understand your comments and use it for good. Based on what I know, I feel that I can provide good criticism because I am not afraid to mention a new idea or thought to the writer of the paper I am critiquing.  I will always try and understand what the author is trying to say, then respond with a question or thought that will hopefully help them continuing in the direction they are headed and expand on the details of their paper.  Having someone other than yourself read your paper is very helpful because they can catch many mistakes that you missed.  I also like that they can think of more content to include in your paper if you do not have all the right ideas.  Personally the most helpful critique someone can give me is their opinion on whether they consider my paper to be strong and effective in arguing my point.  I worry about how much of my content is actually helping my case and how much is just filling space.  I really want my papers to be well written and organized, so having someone comment and critique in that particular area would really be helpful.  If people weren’t so nice about critiquing it would also be helpful.  It really hard to gain anything when people just say “good job” or “nice paper”.  I would want someone to go into detail about what they really thought of my paper.  I think it would also be helpful if they offered tips on how to improve it. Overall I think that a critique should be detailed and include useful tips, ideas, and thoughts for the paper.

Shitty First Drafts

      In the article Lamott mentions just filling your rough draft with all your thoughts then editing it later.  I find that I like to be a little bit more organized with my rough drafts and have trouble with wanting it to be too perfect.  I like that the author says that you should just start writing and not worry about stuff.   I found one part to be very helpful in easing my stress level when first writing a draft and that was the part in the article where it talks about how the first draft is the “get it down” draft and the second is the “fix it up draft”.   I think that approaching your drafts in this technique is a good practice because you wont be as worried about the quality of your paper.  Doing it in this way also let’s the writer focus on all the content that he or she wants to fit into the paper.  Knowing that the first draft is not what you will end up with makes it easier to just write all my thoughts down.  One part of the article I found very weird and not useful at all was the section where it discussed put all the voices in your head as mice in jars.  I don’t really have a problem with lots of voices in my head and I normally have a good focused idea of what I want to say. Because of that, I found that technique to be kind of ridiculous and not applicable for me.  The part where the author discusses school lunches is kind of confusing and I did not really get the point that was trying to be made.  I assume it was just talking about getting a lot of information about your topic so that you have a good amount of material to work with in your paper.  The section titled “polaroids” presented writing a paper is a new way that I found interesting.  The author compared writing a first draft to being able to watch a Polaroid develop.  This analogy is suggesting that you won’t know what your paper is going to look like until it all comes together.  This can be a bit scary if you are the kind of person that likes to know exactly what the plan for your paper is.  I feel as if I always have a good idea of how my paper is going to turn out.   But just like the author mentioned in the article, I sometimes think of something later that I had not thought of before that is perfect for my paper, like that of seeing the final image develop in a Polaroid.  Overall I feel as if this article was helpful when I approached the first paper assignment.  I did not worry as much about the first draft as usual and I just began writing down my thought.  Luckily my rough draft turned out much like I had planned but with even more information and content than I thought I would be able to write.

What is it?

           I think that a rhetorical analysis is when you breakdown a type of “text” and look at the aspects used by the author to persuade the audience.  You analyze the methods used and why the author used them.  You also think about the audience the “text” is targeting and what kind of message it is sending.  For a rhetorical analysis it is best if you categorize the different appeals into logos, ethos and pathos.  It makes locating the deeper meaning or reasoning of the “text” much easier.  The purpose of a rhetorical analysis is to figure out how the author wants to you to respond.  It will also help you figure out why the author wants you to respond that way.  A rhetoric analysis requires attention to small details and picking apart the “text”. You must think about every aspect of the material and how the author is trying to persuade you.  A rhetorical analysis should have three parts with each part discussing ways that “text” appeals either to logos, pathos or ethos.

            I plan on organizing my rhetorical analysis first by discussing my advertisement.  Then I will move on to the three basic appeals and talk about the specific details of the commercial that appeal to pathos first. The appeals in the ad to ethos are not as strong as to logos or pathos so I am choosing to do the pathos appeals first so that my paper will start strong with pathos and end strong with the logos appeal. In the first section of my paper that will discuss the pathos appeal I will include how the ad displays the actors.  I will talk about why these happy emotions shown through the actors appeal to people and persuade the viewer to buy the product.  I will also discuss how the add target women for their product and how that also makes a difference in the appeal. Second I will look at the ethos appeals present in the ad. I will include how the brand in my ad is trusted, has been around for a long time, and many people use it. I will also talk about how the fact that it is number one dentist recommended also adds to the ethos appeal. Lastly I will discuss the appeal to logos.  I will include all the logical reasons shown in the commercial to buy the product.  I will talk about how the Crest White Strips are easy to use and simple.  I’ll also mention the fact that they can be worn anywhere and that it is capable to drink water with them on.  In all three aspects I will be sure to mention how the different details appeal to me personally.  I’ll also discuss how I feel after viewing the commercial and whether or not it was effective in its primary goal. I will also be sure to indicate with appeal I found to be the most convincing out of the three. Hopefully I should be able to do a thorough rhetorical analysis of the Crest White Strips Advanced Seal commercial I found.

Propaganda

Propaganda has changed a lot over time because of the new and different issues that we are facing today.  The media is constantly displaying the threats that we should be concerned with as Americans.  With all this new technology that is available today, propaganda can be even more persuasive and creative.  Technology allows images to be digitally altered or enhanced to further the effect of the propaganda.  Nowadays the pictures are so graphic and detailed that they are much more convincing.

The media today sends many messages through what is shown on television, printed in magazines and newspapers, and what we hear on the radio. There are many issues in today’s world that the media shoves at the public and demands a response.  One common issue that has had lots of propaganda surrounding it is the theory of global warming or global climate change.  There are plenty of images displaying the world with flames around it hinting at the fact that the earth is heating up.  There are also photos of polar bears stranded on floating pieces of ice in the middle of water.  Below is an example of global warming propaganda where a fish dead is laying on dry and cracked ground because the water in which it lived has apparently dried up.  These types of images send an urgent message to the public that global warming is occurring and that they should do something about it.

         

      Another environmental issue that has recently blown up the media is the oil spill in the gulf.  BP has been the direct target for much of today’s propaganda. Most of the images send out a negative message in regards to BP, must like the one below. 

Other oil spill propaganda does not direct their efforts towards BP but towards the bigger issue: America’s dependence on fossil fuels.  They are trying to convince Americans that the lifestyle in which they live cannot be sustained and they are calling for a more eco-friendly or green way of life.  The one below jokingly compares America to Peter Pan, but also has a BP symbol placed in the picture as well.  Another has the cartoon character Spongebob floating dead in oil filled water.

   

These types of propaganda focus on the issue of the environment.  People want America to realize the problems with our wastefulness and overuse of limited natural resources.  The media tells us that we should feel threatened by the degradation of our precious planet and do something about it.

Another big issue that the media displays is the problem with obesity in America.

This one particular picture is addressing the issue of childhood obesity.  It over exaggerates the size of the child to add emphasis.  It displays fast food and parents as the culprit for the issue. It is obviously trying to send the message to parents that those types of food are not good for children.  Another example of childhood obesity propaganda is this picture that is a new take of the logo for Wendy’s.

It very simply asks a question of “When will we save our children?”  This particular one is very clear as to what kind of message it is trying to get across to its audience.  It is calling for America to fight against obesity and “save’ the children.

All of these images are types of propaganda that are present today in 2010.  Each has its only special message that it is trying to send to people whether it is that global warming is a threat to life as we know it, or that our dependence on oil must stop, or that the issue of obesity is an urgent situation that needs to be addressed.

Preliminary Thoughts

For this first paper assignment I think I am leaning towards using a commercial.  It would probably be one the Crest White Strips ads found on television.  Those advertisements have many appeals to the three main aspects.  If I used this particularly ad I have in mind, I would definitely address the large amounts of appeal to pathos.  The women in the ad are smiling the entire duration of the commercial.  They seem to be extremely happy and are having fun.  The women are also seen with guys, talking and laughing on the phone, jogging and going out with other smiling women.  This commercial is obviously trying to appeal to the audience’s emotion through the happiness and joy expressed by the actors of the ad.  The display on such contentment when using white strips plants the idea that if one uses the Crest White Strips they will as a result be happier.  I would also discuss the appeal to logos that is present in the ad.  In the commercial it displays the women do many daily activities while wearing the white strips. The narrator of the commercial claims that one can wear the strips while doing just about anything.  One woman is changing her clothes, one is washing her face, talking on the phone and another is drinking water.  These details of the ad are appeal to the logical and convenience of using the Advance Seal Crest White Strips. The commercial also claims that the Strips use all new technology that allows them to adhere better than the regular white strips.  The narrator also says that these particular whitening fits any life and every smile as pictures of very different women scroll across the screen. At the very end of the commercial it displays a fact at the bottom in white letters, stating that these Crest White Strips are the number one dentist recommended brand. This can be categorized as logos because it is a type of fact or statistic, but also as ethos because it is using the trusted figure of a dentist to convince viewers to buy the product. It also has an appeal to ethos through the fact that Crest is a well-known and trusted brand that has provided the public with many products for teeth.

            I feel that this commercial does a very good job of appealing to all three areas and I find the ad to be effective in its goal to convince women to invest in white strips.  I am not quite sure of roadblocks that I may have to overcome between now and completing my first paper.  I feel pretty good about the ad I have chosen and my ability to expand on it and complete a rhetorical analysis.  I may have a little trouble with meeting the length requirement, but hopefully Robert’s article gave me the right helpful information to put to use in the paper. I think if I just remember the tips of how to write a great paper I won’t hit too many roadblocks.

Gender and Bathrooms

     Americans have a set idea of what they consider to be male and female.  Most people in the US have certain characteristics that they associate with men and women.  Americans overall agree on the basic beliefs they have on what a man should be like:  have a penis, have broad shoulders, should display a rough and touch attitude, not wear skirts and be the total opposite of women.  Women are characterized by wearing skirts, having bows in their hair, having breasts, having wider hips or smaller waist, having long hair, and being very fragile and delicate. 

All these assumptions can be very hurtful to the people that see them.  If one does not fit the description or the image he or she sees on a sign they maybe have a hard time when using public places that are separated by gender such as bathrooms.  The common signs for restrooms display a very vague outlook on who should be using the facilities.  Not all women wear skirts and in today’s modern world I would guess that on an average day there are more women in the US wearing shorts or pants than there are wearing skirts.  The signs that display women as fragile people with breasts and a skirt made offend or hurt a woman who does not look like the image she sees.  The same thing goes for the male restroom signs. The depiction of men as big and buff with large chests and broad shoulders is very inaccurate and also give a negative and detrimental image to men who do not look like that. 

            There are so many different clothing types, body types, personal styles and different aspects that affect a person’s appearance.  A woman can dress in pants and a collared shirt but still be a woman and use a women’s restroom yet she does not fit the description that the sign portrays.  The reason the signs for bathrooms look the way they do is because of the associations that have been made with each gender.  All the associations are general, but for the most part true.  For example men for the most part don’t wear skirts or the color pink, and women normally don’t have very broad shoulders or stand up when they use the restroom.  Although these associations are true sometimes, the use of such generalizations for signs and separation leaves people with just black and white. Is there not a gray area?  People who are transgender are left having to look at signs that do not depict them at all.

I have never come across problematic signs for gender; most of the ones I see have what they mean written in English below the pictures. I have however seen the all-familiar triangular shaped people, with the shirt for the women and the chest for the men.  I guess I have just been so accustomed to seeing the signs that I never really thought about all the generalizations and assumptions they are basing the pictures on.

Rhetorical Triangle Ad

    

     This ad is for Dawn soap appeals logos, pathos and ethos and has a very persuasive affect on the viewer. This ad logically presents a product that donates a portion of the profit to help clean animals that have been harmed by oil spills.  In the actual commercial for this soap, they present facts and statistics regarding what they do to help animals and the environment that make the audience more likely to buy the product.  Logically it makes sense to buy something that helps other people or in this case other living things.  Why would you buy a different kind of soap and get nothing in return when you could buy dawn and know that you are helping save adorable animal’s lives.

        

     This ad I think appeals to pathos the most out of the three.  By using cute, lovable, little animals to pull at the audience’s heart and convince them that this is the right soap to buy.  The presentation of the animals in distress evokes a sense of responsibility on the viewer and he or she feels obligated to help save the lives of living creatures by choosing this particular brand of soap.  It is human nature to feel compassion for things in need and that is why the ad concentrates its focus on the aid of animals. 

    

       Lastly this ad doesn’t have a clear appeal to ethos, but in the commercial for the soap it shows scientists and environmentalist cleaning animals that have been covered in oil.  This could be a slight appeal to ethos in that it is using authoritative figures to promote the product.

How to Say Nothing in 500 Words

Roberts did a great job of addressing all the issues and problems with the content of student’s writing.  As I was reading the article I found myself guilty of every single mistake writers make.  I realized that I always choose the easy side of the argument, which leaves my papers uninteresting.  He pointed out that most students pick the most common topic or the one that seems to have the most supporting evidence. I found it interesting that Roberts suggested writing down all the obvious reasons then completely ignoring them and creating abstract ideas.  I’ve always been a little weary of straying from the normal, but apparently in writing it is much better to have original thoughts than common ideas.  I learned that it is better to choose the most unusual of the choices in order to make your paper different from the other students so that your teacher doesn’t get tired of hearing the same thing and you will not receive a low grade.  Another error I was reminded of when reading Robert’s argument, was my overuse of what he calls “padding”.  I tend to use extra words that have no content and only add to the length of the sentence.  I was aware that I often use extra words and it was an actual tactic I have always used when writing papers that I thought I could not make long enough to meet the length requirement.  I also am guilty of using colorful words in situation where they do not belong.  I know that I sometimes add words just to make my sentences more interesting, but in reality I am not helping my cause.  I found the whole article very helpful and I especially liked the section where he discussed certain words that have positive and negative associations.  I never actually thought that in depth about how the readers may react to different words and i found it interesting.  Overall I learned quite a bit from this informative article and found each section to hold very useful information that I will use in future papers.